This blog will be used to chronicle my spiritual journey as a follower of Christ. I have recently gone through some major changes in my life that have forced me to start anew. I already desire to fall back into my old habits, but this will be my outlet. This will be my way of describing my journey. Here I will record my victories and failures, my desires and realities, what I think, how I feel and how I live my life.
Background: For the past 6 or 7 years, I have been struggling with God in regards to my faith. It started as a conversation with God. The gentle and loving command came:
“Follow me”
I replied:
“But, God, I do”
But I wasn’t getting it:
“No, follow me with all of you”
Are you serious?:
“All of me? No, God, you are asking too much of me. All of me I cannot, I willnot give you. In fact you can have none of me. Leave me alone.”
With those words, uttered at the altar of my church, while praying with a pastor, I started a journey. A long, sorrowful, painful, draining journey.
Running from God is horrible. It takes everything in you. It drains your joy, your will to live, your very existence.
Returning to him is hard too. But instead of sluggishness, I’ve felt peace, (dare I say) joy, and relief.
During this time, the verses that God kept presenting in my life were Philippians 1:6 and Jeremiah 2:11.
Philippians 1:6 : “And I am sure of this, that he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ.”[ESV]
This verse always encouraged me because it reminded me that God would never give up on me. Even when I am in open rebellion to him (at least in my heart), he will always pursue me; he will never give up because I am his child.
Jeremiah 29:11 ” ‘For I know the plans I have for you,’ declares the LORD, ‘plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.’ ” [NIV]
This verse always reminded me that what God has in store for me is better than what I have in store for myself. He knows what I need and who I truly am. The world presents a warped version of myself; God will present the real version.
Next time: Specifics. You want to know how God has been working in my life, don’t you?
